I wonder if I'll always be alone and continue to fall.
If I could commit one murder and not pay any consequences, I would kill the one person that I've ever truly loved.
Just to know that he is not with someone else.
I know how sick I am. I know how far away I have crawled from the only essences of reality I've ever seen.
I can't help it.
There is a pain in my stomach that never goes away. There is a pain.
There is a pain in my head, in my eyes, in my ears. A pain that never goes away.
And I dream for miles and miles about rainbow colored skies, about waterfalls and white sands. I dream and I reach but I don't ever catch a glimpse. I don't ever catch the falling star in the twilight sky.
It's time for me to go now. To go cling to the last drops of sanity that I possess.
Just wish I could stop the fall. The fall of me. The fall of tears. The fall of it all.
written on 2003-03-15 at 4:31 p.m.
she / lost