a little bit of a resurrection
my life journal: cutmedown








for one moment


Sometimes I let the truth seep in. Like rain drops into the side walk cracks. Slipping down cold blades of grass. And I let myself hit the pavement. But it fades. It always fades. And I let myself become disillusioned. Looking up into black skies. Losing focus on blurry blotches of stars or color. That's when I run. I run from the pain. Dreams and numbness are my only outlets for the pain. And it scares me when I can't find purity anywhere. It scares me to know that I could be alone forever. For one moment if I could look into the eyes of anyone who knew. Someone who knows the answer to a single one of my burning questions. Maybe it would help. Ease the pain of the burning. The flesh eating flame. Licking my skin in rows of heat. Rows of heat.


written on 2003-03-03 at 8:58 p.m.

she / lost