a little bit of a resurrection
my life journal: cutmedown








second


this feeling i haven't known in so long. truth be told, i didn't think i would ever feel this way again; yet here i am.
honestly somehow i didn't think that you, you of all people would put me back here. how could you do this to me &why? what did i do to deserve this?
that's how i've always handled these things. i find a way to blame myself. i find a way &i ask myself, what did i do?
but this time i can't do it, because for once in my life, i only loved purely &truly. i gave you everything i had to give &this time it is not me who was "not good enough," who didn't "give enough."

you fucking promised me that you wouldn't hurt me. you sat there &you swore to me.

You lied &that's all there is to this. all i ever did was love you &you lied.


written on 2005-04-19 at 12:16 a.m.

she / lost