a little bit of a resurrection
my life journal: cutmedown








the diamond necklace


so close your eyes; you can close your eyes it's alright; i don't know no love songs and i can't sing the blues anymore; but i can sing this song and you can sing this song when i'm gone

[lyrics; james taylor - close your eyes]

& what i am faced with now is what appears to be the very purest manifestation of devastation one can endure. & rain drops of fear fall from the black & scarlet sky. burning my skin; freezing the translucent blood slithering through my veins. & i am fed blindness in the form of sustenance & doctor bills & evening inquisitions.

it's gotten to be more than a struggle. the thoughts of edicius don't seem irrational anymore & it scares me. i do not know if the nightmares are more frequent, but the blood certainly is. & my body aches from all the reaching, all the trying to grab white, glistening stars from twilight skies. i am madame loisel ;; no happy ending here.




written on 2003-10-09 at 9:25 p.m.

she / lost