a little bit of a resurrection
my life journal: cutmedown








holding back


do you ever think of me? do you ever think of me, as i think of you? do you ever think of me, as i think of you, in the nite? do you ever think of me, as i think of you, in the nite, when i can not sleep? do you ever think of me, as i think of you, in the nite, when i can not sleep, because all i can think about is you?

i just wrote you a letter. & unlike all of the other letters i have written, i sent it. yes i sent it. although it was nothing. it was mere chatter. it was really nothing. what i wanted to write was that i miss you. what i wanted to write was that my heart is calling out to yrs always. i wanted to tell you all of the truths. i wanted to share with you a dream. a dream that i have of you & me underneath a waterfall. in a tropical forest. with blood red flowers & crystal clear waters. smooth rocks & soft grass. warm air & a cool breeze. a dream that i have of me in yr arms. forever. yes i sent you a letter but it was mere chatter because i can not tell you these truths.

& i think that anyone who has ever been in lust/love/or otherwise knows what it is that i mean.


written on 2004-01-17 at 10:56 p.m.

she / lost